Sunday, January 29, 2012

I'm Having a Pity Party & You're Invited!!!

Debbie Downer ain't got nothin' on Tara the Terror...Let's see where do I begin? This is a true venting session, so I will begin with my husband...

1. Wesley. Oh Wesley. He's such a good man, but (you knew a conjunction was coming) he is completely obsessive. We've watched the first season of Storage Wars at least ten times. No exaggeration. I CANNOT WATCH ANOTHER STORAGE WARS EPISODE!!! I might throw myself off the balcony if I have to hear Dave say yuuuuup one more time. Wesley, it's high time you learned the difference between loyalty and obsessive compulsive disorder. (He does have both, for the record.)

2. I mopped the kitchen floor twice last week. And it needs to be mopped again. Now, you may think, oh gee, Tara, you only have 124 tiles to mop and most people have quadruple that amount. I have just not accepted the reality that I need to clean everyday and get over it, or just lower my standards of cleanliness.

3. Sometimes I really wonder if Heavenly Father is looking down on me laughing, thinking that haha the joke's on her! When I compare my life to others (which you know we're not supposed to do, but we know we all do it from time to time) I really have to look up to the big man in the sky and question, "Is there no justice in this life?" And don't assume that I think I deserve more than others, it's not that, I just wonder if some people ever have to struggle. Remember when Plato said, "Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle"? Well, the world wide web has really made me question whether Plato really knew what he was talking about. All I can do is remind myself of the quote, "I hope your life is as perfect as it seems on Facebook." And let me add, "And on your blog." I mean come on people, get rrrrreal!

4. I pay my child to go to bed and stay in bed. We're high rollers around here. It's almost like money grows on trees. We pay Scarlet 3-5 cents a night if she stays in her bed all night. I am so sick of the nighttime routine. Anyone who has had to share a room with two little ones who wake each other up constantly can feel my pain. And no, I don't have the heart to lock them in their rooms and let them cry it out.....yet.

5. Here's a debate you can help me settle, one of Wesley and I's biggest disagreements right now is when the kids act up during Sacrament meeting at church. He thinks Ivy needs to be taken out every .5 seconds. He's like the Noise Gestapo. Even if the girls calmly whisper to each other, its dagger eyes from Dad. I mean one squeal out of Ivy and he's pacing the halls with her. I say, yes, she is at a difficult age for church, but if we take her out at the drop of a hat, then how will she ever learn to sit reverently? Also, we serve in Nursery so Sacrament is the only spiritual upliftment I get, so I wanna stay and try to listen. Wes gets to go to institute a couple times a week at school, so he already gets more upliftment than me. So, I say if he wants to take the Ivy boob out he can. You might be thinking that oh, well Wes probably wants to be out roaming the halls too. Maybe he can check his phone while he is out there, or chat with some friends. Well, no that would be incorrect. He is out there with Ivy resenting me the entire time, and the fact that I didn't jump up first to take Ivy into the halls. He then comes back into Sacrament meeting after five to ten minutes and practically throws Ivy at me causing a whole scene. So, what do I do? I take Ivy out and resent him! We're definitely stuck in the drama triangle with this one! And of course, everyone around us can see we're fighting! Did I mention we're at church? I can really see how it would be easier to just not go!

Please sisters, let's get back into this blog! I need something other than sugar and TV to look forward too!!!

4 comments:

Eliza said...

Oh man sounds like you were having a bit of a rough day! Hey we love storage wars as much as the next person around here, it's too bad you can't watch the other seasons. 124 tiles, Tara I can't believe you know how many tiles you have! Yes, you definitely need to lower your cleanliness standards. Just a little. :) NOBODY's life is perfect even though they might want you to think that, also perfect people are SOOOOOO boring! You just need to stop worrying about it and find all the little things in your life to be happy about. Hahaha! Paying Scarlet to go to bed, haven't done that one before, I just yell at my kids, I guess I'm just meaner than you. I cannot bear to lock them in their room either! Now, on the sacrament point I'm pretty opinionated here so hopefully I don't offend Wes too much. I do not take my kids out unless they are crying loudly or running around. Kids are noisy, it's a fact and people better just get used to it. Now we keep it under control and if the noise level gets too high kids have to switch seats or lose their toys or notebooks or snacks until they can be reverent but I believe taking them out teaches them to be noisier because sacrament meeting is so boring for kids and they learn if they act out and are noisy they get to leave. We are struggling with this with Colby. He just takes himself out of the chapel which is driving me crazy. Personally, I feel like the going in and out 10 times is more irreverent than kids who make a little noise. So my rule of thumb is only remove a crying child or a running child. Lighten up, relax and realize that people understand what it's like to have little children and you are doing the right thing by going to church!

Emilie said...

Blogs and facebook are places where a lot of people post happy and perfect looking pictures and events. I'm guilty of this too. I don't blog unless I have some cute pictures to show. But my life is definitely not perfect. Nobody's is. I do understand your frustration and I have been guilty of comparing myself to others too. I have a hard time not doing that so that's, in part, why I don't go on blog and facebook very much anymore. 
I have paid Max to go to bed. We have two bedrooms upstairs and one down. Max would wake up in the middle of the night scared that he was downstairs by himself. The paying worked for a little while, but he got over it. We're trying the room sharing with the two kids, but that has been really hard too. Lately, we've been telling Max (and it's been working) that if he wants to sleep in our room, he can't wake us up and he has to sleep on the floor. This way our sleep isn't getting interrupted by an almost four year old. And we're not yelling, lecturing and bribing. :)
I'm also having problems with sacrament reverence. Neils has been working Sundays these last few weeks and it seems like my kids are getting less and less reverent. If one of them acts up, I have to take them both out and they LOVE roaming the halls. I was actually talking to my friends about this reverence issue on sunday. Their girls are just a few months older than my two kids, but they are so quiet. They said that if one of them is acting up, they take them out, but they make the halls less enjoyable than the chapel. So no walking around, playing with the drinking fountains or drawing on chalkboards in empty classrooms (those are all the things I let my kids do). They force them to sit on their laps and they can't move. They said their girls always ask to come back in to the chapel. Sorry, that describes my problems, not yours. But I agree with Eliza. A baby is going to make some noise and everyone understands that. 
As weird as this sounds, it's nice to hear that we have similar problems. I always wonder what I am doing wrong since I feel like the only one with these problems. So thanks for sharing this not so perfect, but real blog post. :) It's reassuring. 

Michelle said...

I am sorry it took so long to comment. Month end is rough around here as you know. Anyway, I have had many of these exact same feelings. I hate the cleaning everyday part. I think you are right though, I think if you want a clean house that is what you have to do. It sucks. I love the idea of paying Scarlet to go to bed, especially since you can pay her so little. Ha ha! I love it, I am imagining it in my head. I know some people seem like they have it all and have no struggles. It's not true. It's just a cover. We all have good times and bad times. I am really guilty of this, but I have been working on it. We just have to remember that Heavenly Father doesn't care about any of the superficial stuff. There are so many more important things in life, like family! Mia is a Hellion in Sacrament she runs everywhere and cannot sit still and does not want to be with us. Our big thing is that when we do take her out Dan wants to make her sit still, so it's not a reward. I agree but it's just so hard for me when she freaks out. She has been doing better though. Love you.

Hardwick Family said...

Thank you for this!! Just what I needed to hear.. misery loves company!!: ) Not that I am happy for your hard times bc I am not!! I am just happy to relate.