A recent moment of guilt-free motherhoodMy oldest just turned 12 and I'm expecting baby #6 in a few months. I feel like I'm walking this fine line of being a "more mature" mother and yet still being a mother of young kids. I don't have teenagers yet but I've been doing this mothering thing for awhile so I should feel more like a pro, right? I don't. Sometimes I wonder what other people think of me. Do they think "that woman is crazy" or something like "wow, how does she do it all?" Honestly, I never feel like I do it all and quite often I do feel crazy!
Granted, I don't have 10 kids or anything but some people's reactions to five can be a bit overwhelming. I don't think that mothering such a large family is as hard as most people think it is. Wait a minute, maybe I'm doing something wrong? Maybe it should be harder and I'm just missing something. I mean I get it, there are plenty of things I should be doing that I don't, but why should I beat myself up over all the areas I fall short (and there are many). As mothers don't we spend enough time feeling guilty for all the things we do wrong or don't do at all? I look at my kids and while they are normal kids (by normal I mean fight like the dickens with their siblings, play too many video games, complain about chores, throw tantrums, etc.), they are also really good kids who excel in school, don't really get into any trouble at all, make friends easily (most of them, anyway) and I hope one day they will contribute productively to society. And so I say- guilt be gone! I'm tired of feeling bad or worrying about what other people think. I'm doing ok, and I'm ok with that, for now it's good enough for me. No More Mom Guilt.
Granted, I don't have 10 kids or anything but some people's reactions to five can be a bit overwhelming. I don't think that mothering such a large family is as hard as most people think it is. Wait a minute, maybe I'm doing something wrong? Maybe it should be harder and I'm just missing something. I mean I get it, there are plenty of things I should be doing that I don't, but why should I beat myself up over all the areas I fall short (and there are many). As mothers don't we spend enough time feeling guilty for all the things we do wrong or don't do at all? I look at my kids and while they are normal kids (by normal I mean fight like the dickens with their siblings, play too many video games, complain about chores, throw tantrums, etc.), they are also really good kids who excel in school, don't really get into any trouble at all, make friends easily (most of them, anyway) and I hope one day they will contribute productively to society. And so I say- guilt be gone! I'm tired of feeling bad or worrying about what other people think. I'm doing ok, and I'm ok with that, for now it's good enough for me. No More Mom Guilt.
Can you see the pouting pre-teen in the background? Nope, not suffering any guilt over this incident.
You see that tantrum throwing two year old on the end? Yep, he cried the whole time while riding on Dumbo during a recent trip to Disneyland. I mean, I didn't know that was allowed at the Happiest Place on Earth. He even threw his hat into the water below.
4 comments:
Haha! You are so inspirational! I am going to take heed to this advice and let a lot of certain things go, because honestly who can really do it all, right?
You are a rare gem, who does not seem crazy, nor do your kids. They are totally normal, and very well adjusted.
And when you have teenagers. I. Will. Die.
Eliza, I wish I had heard something like this a long, long time ago! I love you and the blessing of having the opportunity of sharing our home with you. Teenage hood is just around the corner. Be prepared!
So are you predicting your death next year Tara? It will be here so soon! I am surprised that my only ever wanted to be a mom, best cookie baking, reads good books to her kids - sister had so much of that! (By the way, I am none of those!) It's great to see you enjoying your kids so much! Truly inspiring! Love ya!
I am glad to be catching this early. I definitely feel guilty. Yeah teenage years, that is pretty scary. I am glad that at least one or two (hopefully) of my kids are close in some of yours and Aliece's. Sometimes I really don't know how you do it Eliza. Love you and Miss you!
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