"If you judge people, you have no time to love them." -Mother Theresa
All day long we make judgements. Eliza expanded her feelings on a Mother's guilt in her recent post, and Aliece talked about accepting herself, all along the same lines of not judging ourselves. I am encouraged to hear my sisters' wisdom and maturity. It inspires me to try to get to the same place. Recently I have been working on paying attention to the judgement language I hear from myself and others. It is everywhere...the good, the bad, the 'should' and 'should nots'.
If I know my family like I think I do they will take the judgement issue and play devil's advocate. This topic evokes such emotion. The judgement issue can be a complex one because on one hand we hear, "Don't judge," and then on the other spectrum, "Use good judgement." Even the scriptures can seemingly contradict themselves at times telling us to not judge others, as well as to use righteous judgement. I am referring to the judgement Satan uses as his tool to bring down others. It wasn't until recently that I took a step back to analyze my judgements that I realized how often and easily I fall into the judgement trap. Why not instead, simply draw a conclusion, without judging it bad or good? Why do we as humans (especially women) feel the need to label it one way or another? It seems so often as women the person we judge most often and most harshly is ourselves. I cannot tell you how sad this makes me feel. I know so many inspirational women, who fall victim to the plague of judgement.
So how do we change it? I know, it's so much easier said than done. However, with mindful thinking we can catch ourselves and give ourselves and others a break. Mindfulness creates choice in the situations. It's like The Power of Now. (Highly recommend that book) When we are mindfully living in the moment it also allows us to use our intuitions. A thought is just a thought, not a factual piece of concrete evidence, and there is freedom in that statement. We can acknowledge the good and the bad without judging it.When I am aware of the moment, a certain peace and calmness guides me. I only wish it were so easy to maintain. I love the quote by Mother Theresa, "If you jugde people, you have no time to love them." I think it most importantly applies to ourselves.
Ok, now that my brain hurts from all this thinking I am going to go eat a Snickers ice cream bar, and not judge myself.
Ok, now that my brain hurts from all this thinking I am going to go eat a Snickers ice cream bar, and not judge myself.
5 comments:
I definitely need this reminder. A Sunday School teacher once told our class that we need to judge situations and not people. I felt like that put it into perspective really well. I am definitely my worst critic, it can get so tiring. I try to tell myself to just give me a break and cut myself some slack. Love you.
I did write a comment to this one earlier but I was logged in as you and when I went to change it, it deleted my comment and I was too impaient to retype it. I love this topic because I think it's one that most people have to work on and it gives us so much to think about. I know I have a hard time in certain areas. I'm trying harder to look at people's circumstances and adopt the thinking that nobody knows what each other goes through so how can we possibly judge others for the choices they make. That being said we do have to judge circumstances to keep us and our kids safe. I need to try and pattern myself more after the Savior who loved everyone but did not tolerate all behavior, I think it's a difficult balance to strike.
This is a topic I have given a lot of thought lately. Because I want so much to be like the Savior. Its difficult to figure it all out. Maybe I'm making it too complicated. So I'll just love everyone and the Lord will take care of the rest. As for the self thing it doesn't bug me too terribly much. Just a little.
This is something I have pondered quite a bit for the last couple of years. I am thankful that the Savior knows us all, circumstanes and everything and loves us unconditionally - no matter what! He understands the victims and the perpetraitors of this world. A lot to wrap your mind around. For me, some days are better than others!
I think this is good to try and live by. Even though I am still a little confused: ) I need examples: ) but it is so hard not to judge. A continuous learning process!
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