They say to pick your battles. I'm sure every marriage has those issues you have to choose. It could be the ole' putting the lid back on the toothpaste, taking out the trash, or putting your shoes away. I'm sure anyone could be nitpicked apart, and I'm sure I could be the girl to do it. Call me negative Nancy. I like to think of it as having a detailed eye.
I know I can annoy my husband. But, boy can he ANNOY me. All it takes is a bit (more than a bit) of facial hair. For years I have been in distress over my husband's side burns! They aren't just sideburns, they are chops that would make Elvis' burns look weak. I don't know what it is, they just bug me. Like so bad. I mean, I really throw a fit over this one. We call it a B fit. Just talking about it makes my blood pressure rise. And my heart pound. And my head swirl with angry thoughts.
And let me tell you, it's only HIS sideburns. I like them on other guys. I don't know what it is, maybe it's a control issue. I keep my hair longer-ish for him, so why does he to have the ugly burns? I try to manipulate the situation anyway I can.
He thinks growing facial hair is the defining thing about a man. I've caught him looking at facial hair websites. I've seen him admire other men's in public. The longer he went without burns, the more his fetish grew. We even had a public debate over it on Facebook. And the majority agreed with me. I've cried to my sisters about it. I've cried to my friends about it. Hell, I even cried to my parents. I even thought about calling Dr.Laura But, deep down I know what she would say. (But, she seems to side with the husband most of the time anyway.
I knew what I had to do. I had to let it go, and accept him. I mean he is the best husband and dad, this is such a trivial issue. So, I've given up. And am letting him be him.
Last night, as we climbed into bed together, I reached over to gently stroke his cheek and ended up petting a patch of hair. "It's like petting a cat," I said. And then he started purring and meowing. And we laughed. Here he is proudly showing off his man chops on our family hike just this morning. And I am telling myself he is completing the family photo, not ruining it with his burns. ;)
4 comments:
Ha Ha Tara I loved this post! Facial hair is a battle that I choose to let go also! Whatever makes em happy and feel more manly I guess. I love your family pic it is really cute. You and Wes always keep me laughing!
There are battles and then there are BATTLES! I remember when we were first married. While brushing his teeth your Dad would brush his tongue so far back, he would gag everytime! And I would say can't you stop before you gag. Of course he said no, because then I'll miss part of my tongue. Then one day we had a friend who was killed in a bicycle accident. Well that did it. After that I was thankful to hear that noise cuse it meant I knew he was still alive. And I was so very thankful!
I'm so glad Keith doesn't have enough facial hair to grow! I didn't dare bug him about his hair when he grew it out! His mom did it enough for both of us. When you know how nagging feels, you don't want to do it to someone else! We all have things of our own and things in others that bug us. Glad you're laughing!
Grrr, so grouchy when I type a big long comment and then something goes wrong on the sign-in and it gets deleted. Kris has always used his hair/facial hair as a form of creativity and individuality and I've tried hard not too make too big of a deal about things, although this can be hard sometimes. Especially when you feel like they're just doing it to rile you up. But I'm glad you guys can laugh about this now. Like mom was saying, in the big picture this is a small thing.
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